When I decided to start blogging, I wanted to be able to have a place to journal all the cute-fun things that our family is doing. I wanted to be able to write my feelings down and be able to remember all the things that I am blessed with and have to be thankful for. But this past month I have honestly had such a hard time feeling very blessed or even being very thankful for much. As long as I can remember February has been my very least favorite month of the year. February seems to me to be the longest month out of the year-not the shortest!!
I remember the first day of February this year, so well. I woke up that morning and felt like I had been ran over by a train. Every inch of my body ached, my head was pounding and my throat felt like I had swallowed a porcupine!! I wish today I would have listened to my body trying to tell me to stay in bed, and just slept the entire month of February 2009 off! I remember looking at the calendar later that day, and staring at the LONG 28 days ahead in the longest month of the year! I told myself that I could do it, that I would have a great February and not get depressed this year. Oh WOW!! I often wonder if the things that get me so down in February would get me as depressed in any other month. No, no one has passed away that I love, and the things that have gotten me down are mostly material things. But none the less hard to try and figure out when you try so hard, why so many bad things still have to happen. As I have tried these past few weeks to stay upbeat and not lose it, I have honestly prayed for an end to the misery, for some good news and happy times. Then I remembered that in order for me to really know happiness and appreciate my blessings, I must also know pain and suffering. If life gave us everything we asked for and we never had to suffer, we would never grow and never truly be happy. No, this doesn't make the hardships any easier to endure, but it helps us be grateful for the good times once the hardships have passed.
So as the longest-shortest month of the year comes to an end, I know that someday I will look back on February 2009 and appreciate it for what it gave me. It has helped me remember that the most important things in life are being with the people I love-nothing else really matters. And that as unpredictable as I know life is, things can always get worse, but they can also always get better!!
Side note to self: Run away to Mexico, Hawaii or the Caribbean next February!!
Mikelle Graduation 2015
9 years ago